June 2009 - Ask me anything
"My friend won't
repay the money she owes me"
We're not rich but we manage our money well and
save up for things. Last year one of my oldest friends asked for a
short-term loan to see her out of a difficulty, which I gave her
without hesitation. For weeks I didn't mention it but
eventually I asked when I might be repaid. She said she'd come
back to me but then started to avoid me. Last week I cornered her
and asked for my money, pointing out that I needed it to pay for my
daughter's first year at university. She turned on me and said
I was being unfair, that she hadn't got the money we had and
she couldn't see any way of paying me back in the foreseeable
future. I haven't told my husband what I've done as I know
he'll be furious, both with her and also with me. Lisa
DENISE SAYS: She may be so deeply in debt that she
can't honour her promise or may just be a freeloader who has
borrowed money without any intention of repaying it. If it's
not a large sum I would advise you to own up to your husband and
write the money - and the friend - off to experience. If it's
too large to do that, you and your husband could see her together.
If she is married it's possible her husband knows nothing about
this and may feel obliged to repay you. If not the only option is
legal action but, if you have no written proof of the debt, this
could prove an expensive road to take - the Citizens Advice Bureau
(www.citizensadvice.org.uk) can advise on this.
It's good to help a friend, but putting safeguards in place
when you do so is the only way to avoid any future unpleasantness.
To read more from Denise Robertson please join.
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