February 2011 - On the Couch
Do you believe in love at first sight?
This is the time of year when Cupid dusts off his arrow and our
thoughts turn to romance, so we asked three readers whether they
believe love can happen in a heartbeat or if it needs time to grow
into an enduring relationship.
Reader profiles:
Sharon Shinwell, 56,
is a relationship counsellor at Here To Listen, a practice in
Manchester she runs with husband of 35 years, Alan,
59. She
says lust and love can be confused.
Roberta Smart, 42,
doesn't believe in love at first sight. A divorcee, she lives
in Cheltenham with partner of 14 years, Alistair Howard, 37, and
children Kelsey, 13, and Harley, 10.
Suzy Ould, 37, says
she fell in love with husband Neil, 41, the first time they met 20
years ago. They married six years ago and now live in Milton Keynes
with their son Ryan, 13.
How did you fall in love with your partner?
Suzy: "I met my husband Neil at my sister's boyfriend's flat when I was 16 and Neil was 20. As soon as he walked in I completely fell for him. I knew I would be with him for the rest of my life."
Sharon: "Do you think it was a physical attraction initially?"
Suzy: "No, I loved everything about him. We spent the weekend together and I realised I liked his looks and character. We have been a couple ever since. Over the last 20 years we've had some real trials - in June 2000 I was diagnosed with a brain tumour and had to travel to France for eight weeks of specialist radiotherapy - but it made my relationship with Neil stronger and we are still very happy together."
Sharon: "It wasn't as instant for me - I met my husband Alan when I was 18 and we'd both been out with various people before. After a month together we knew it was something more serious. People got married a lot younger back then and relationships were different to how they are today. If you were comfortable with someone and had the same interests, that was a good foundation and it would grow from there. My husband and I have been together for 35 years, we have worked together for the last 15 years and we rarely argue."
Roberta: "When I met my partner Alistair we were working at the same pub. Initially I was reluctant for it to become anything serious, so whereas Sharon spent the first month falling in love, I spent the first month trying not to! But then he sold his motorbike to buy a car so he could take me out, and that really shocked me. When we were driving home that night I felt as though all the pieces had just clicked together and I realised that, in fact, I really did want to be with him. It wasn't like 'oh my god, I love you' - it was more a recognition.
Have your say!
Do you believe in love at first sight? (CLOSED)
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