Best laid plans…

RMlbxLoneRangerA_lgUgh, I’ve decided I hate January. I’ve finished my “Ask MA” beginner’s guide to planning a budget, and guess what – all my pounds are in the wrong places. There are hardly any in my bank account and far too many on my credit card and round my waist. I had to dig out my dreaded emergency magic knickers this morning and it didn’t help my new “from bath to bus top in 30 minutes” routine one little bit.

I’ve worked out I’m carrying about 20 extra pounds round my middle and am short about £100 a week, so it’s time to take myself in hand and shift those pounds back to their rightful places. I started yesterday by taking my own lunch to work – I was mightily cheered up by discovering an old tin American-style lunchbox decorated with rearing horses and cowboys. It’s camper than Jonathan Ross stalwarts Four Puffs and a Piano, but I carried my chicken and roast pepper wrap into work feeling like a cross between Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and Dan Connor from Roseanne.

This morning didn’t go so well – I overslept and so all my energies went into throwing Rice Crispies at the kids and re-organising last night’s chicken pasta into a packed lunch for them. Doughnut is the only creature in the house who gets remotely excited by last night’s leftovers and even he turns his overbred nose up if there’s a whisper of garlic in it.

I tried to make a token effort by at least bringing in my own coffee, but my once sleek state of the art thermos has now morphed into a smelly, dented, bullet-shaped white elephant with a lid that won’t fit together. After three attempts all I’d managed to do was cover the kitchen in coffee, scald my thumb and miss the bus. That’s ten minutes I’ll never see again.

By the time I got to work I needed a giant cappuccino and an almond Danish to calm my nerves. But I refuse to be daunted. Tomorrow I’m going to try salad – I’ve just spent £3 on a giant bag of spinach, so I’d better set my alarm otherwise we’ll be eating slimy grass cuttings all weekend…

Posted by Amanda Blinkhorn


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